Hospitality is a common theme of the early church. The disciples broke bread in houses, gave thanks, and God was multiplying them each day. But as the homes opened... who was doing the baking of the bread?
Who set the table, poured the wine, and made space for people coming off the streets as they received good news, the Holy Spirit, and maybe even a water baptism earlier that day? So...towels, too!
Full houses of believers have long been a mark of the Church. Shoes crowd the entryway, extra chairs pulled out from every place possible, food on the table. The hosts are busy bees, but their eyes glow with joy as they watch people connecting and God moving among them.
Hospitality is a ministry. Saint Benedict’s 'Rule of Life' had a core pillar of Hospitality, carrying the conviction that “they must be received as Christ.” It doesn’t have to be complex or ritzy. It can be as simple as a hug and welcome at the door, an invite for coffee, an honest conversation.
But these days, houses brimming with conversation are not the norm. We’re in an age of loneliness, isolation, and ultimate distraction.
So what’s missing? And how do we get back to those warm, intimate moments?
It may be as simple as an invitation.
Maybe you’ve been waiting for yours.
But how long could you wait?
The irony is that many of us are waiting for our invitation to community - and few are willing to be the ones who create it.
All it takes?
An invitation. A cup of coffee. A space to be. Something to share.
Here are some ways community is naturally—or intentionally—created:
- Shared Cause or Vision
- Shared Passion
- Sharing Food
- Working Together
- Shared Problem
- Time Spent Together
- Proximity
I’ll share a few of my favorites I’ve experienced:
Pancake Party
On a recent road trip, my wife and I visited Lancaster, PA. Our good friend Andrew lives there, working as an ER nurse at the time.
One of the days, Andrew told us his girlfriend Hope and her roommates were hosting their monthly pancake party that evening - and we were invited.
A pancake party? Count me in.
We showed up to an apartment full of people. Apparently this had been a tradition for a few years. It was iconic.
The only plan was pancakes. Invite anyone you want.
The house smelled of bacon, syrup, and coffee. We waltzed through the living room where people were standing, sitting—being wherever there was room.
As it turned out, half of them didn’t know many others, and they all were sharing how they got invited or who invited them.
One couple came in at dusk and said,
“Uh… we were told there were pancakes here?”
Being near the door, I was the first to greet them.
“You bet!”
Later I walked into the kitchen and asked if they needed help. The kitchen was pumping out goodness. I volunteered some time flipping pancakes and got to know one of the roommates, Malia.
We danced to music, swapped stories, and churned out pancakes.
As I walked around passing out the goods, I heard people sharing stories, asking questions, and getting to know each other. One girl was in tears on the couch, talking to a couple who were encouraging her with words of comfort. Others were sitting on the grass outside, laughing and eating.
As my wife and I pulled away in the car afterwards, we marveled at how special the night had been...and how simple!
Simple is often the way-to-go with creating community. It always starts with an invite, but can come in many ways... this next one is one of my favorites!
Early Mornings
For me, Early Mornings is capitalized. It’s a thing—an event.
The sequence of waking up dark and early, prepping the coffee, and opening the door to friends was on repeat for a long time. Somehow it still is. It became a bit of an obsession… not just for me, for many in my community. We encountered something that once felt impossible.
What started as an idea—wake up and do something together that would otherwise be way too hard—became one of the most sustaining habits of my life.
And I couldn’t have done it alone.
There’s a unique electricity in the air when it’s still dark out and people are gathering for no other reason than to be with God, sit quietly with Scripture, or reflect on their lives in the presence of friends.
Over the past 8 years, in kitchens and living rooms, on rooftops, over Zoom calls, in Mexico, Colorado, Canada, Europe, and beyond, we've been gathering a few times a week at 5AM.
I’ve seen something remarkable: it’s easier to do hard things when you’re not doing them alone.
Think about CrossFit, running clubs, or even a 12-step recovery program… they all use community as the catalyst to meet real needs.
That first morning back in 2017, I invited a couple of friends to wake up early and join me at my house. I brewed the coffee, opened the door, and we sat in the quiet with our Bibles and journals. It was simple, but as we processed it afterward over breakfast, it was so helpful to do it together.
From there, it kept going. Occasional glances at my bible and a neglected journal were the norm for my whole life. Instead, weekly deep-dives of reflection and scripture became this unstoppable rhythm, as my wife and I kept opening our doors.
What helped me also helped those who came. We grew from a few friends to dozens, eventually upgrading houses just to fit everyone.
During COVID, we began using Zoom, and friends from around the world joined. At one point, 21 Early Morning calls were happening per week across time zones—while I was only hosting four.
The only reason I’ve kept this rhythm alive for eight years is because I haven’t been doing it alone. I’ve spent so much time in reflection, Scripture, and conversation with friends, and it has become one of the highlights of my life.
My parents, Soul Care’s founders, experienced this joy and transformation as they opened their doors to others while seeking the space and reflection they themselves needed. Here’s Mindy’s story:
Semi-Silent Retreats
“On New Year’s Day in 2001, Jeff and I escaped to a hotel lobby near my parents’ new home in Scottsdale, AZ, to spend a few hours with our journals and Bibles in an elegant surrounding—time for reflection, prayer, and dreaming about the year to come.
During our time, we “took inventory” of our lives… our experiences, gifts, setbacks—everything. After a time of reflection on the year prior and the year ahead, we wondered, What might God have had in mind for a couple like this?
We asked ourselves:
- What’s important about this year?
- What must get done?
- What’s important about the future?
We re-surrendered everything to God again. We even signed the page like a contract and spent some time in prayer.
Then we trudged home to our squirrely young boys and enjoyed the rest of the day in the AZ sunshine. Nothing dramatic happened.
But by the next New Year’s Day, almost everything in our daily life had changed. God had opened pathways for us that would shape decades to come.
We came to see how vital it is to have that kind of dedicated reflection, prioritization, and surrender at the beginning of each year. Not every year brought dramatic change, but the practice became essential—especially in the hardest seasons.
When we moved to Colorado, we carried the tradition with us and realized it would be fun to welcome others into that space. A quasi-retreat and quasi–open house. Not a party, not a retreat—something in between. Space for reflection and prayer, but together.
I created a simple document explaining the process. We made a pot of chili, brewed hot cider, lit candles, and welcomed a handful of folks throughout the day. I still remember Charlena and Jena sitting by the fire with steaming mugs, deep in reflection. Afterward, we shared what God had revealed and prayed for one another.
Once it was written down, I offered to send it to our Soul Care mailing list… and people all over the world replied that they were gathering in homes to provide similar spaces of reflection, connection, intention, surrender, and prayer.
Then in 2020, struggling to keep up with my own resolve to spend a monthly half-day in solitude, I invited a few others to join me on Zoom. And so the monthly Semi-Silent Retreat began. We gather, welcome, explain the theme, move off Zoom for extended solitude, then reconvene to share. It has become an absolute lifeline.
We’ve now done these monthly for five years—each with a fresh theme but the same flow.
We’ve gathered from South Africa, Savannah, Atlanta, Zambia, Dallas, Toronto, London, Zurich, and beyond.
As 2021 approached, we thought: Why not merge the Annual New Year’s Day retreat with the Semi-Silent format? Kaboom—a perfect collision. Longer reflection time, longer debrief, and a powerful shared experience.”
Empowering the Practice of Gathering
In this next season at Soul Care, we are focusing our effort on empowering the art of gathering—in your home, at your local coffee shop, at your church.
The future is unknown, but this is certain: community is key to our soul’s flourishing. Even soul care can’t be done fully alone. Sure, some of it is behind closed doors, meeting with our Father in secret.
But some of the best soul care is done together—when we are vulnerable, pray for one another, and seek God side by side.
We are invited to reflect together, to choose the hard, healthy, good ways of living... the ways of God’s Kingdom. And that is not a lone-wolf operation. It’s teamwork.
So we are asking ourselves... and now asking you:
- How can you create community?
- How can you gather people in meaningful, Kingdom-minded ways?
- How may God use it and bless it?
As you discover your gift to share, your food to offer, your problem to solve alongside others… you will experience the blessing and joy of hospitality.
This year, we are encouraging folks to host these New Year's retreats in their own local communities. We love that. We are already hearing from many who are hosting or planning to host their own retreats for on January 1st!
In 2026, the monthly Semi-Silent Retreat rhythm will continue for our Soul Care Rhythms members, and we will equip our mailing list to do their own private retreats or even facilitate a soul-care pop-up retreat using our monthly guide.
This will massively multiply the number of people engaging in a monthly rhythm of retreat—and massively multiply healthy, in-person, face-to-face interactions, which matter so much in our day!